Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

thumb_up thumb_down

What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down

What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

thumb_up thumb_down

You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was Jimmy upset? He wasn't.

thumb_up thumb_down

wanna hear a joke? womans rights

thumb_up thumb_down

What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a bar. There is no one there.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? It was my car.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why is Chuck Norris so frickin awesome? He just is cause he's chuck norris

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the Asian girl doing a math problem? It was her homework that her teacher assigned her class.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

10 Mexicans are in a car. Who is driving? 1 of the Mexicans.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the 80 year old man do to celebrate valentines day with his wife? Nothing, Alzheimer's made him forget about Valentines day.....and that he was married. What did his wife do for Valentines day? Killed herself.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A blonde, a brunnette, and a red head all jump from the top of a building. They all land at the same time because of Newton's 3rd Law

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Person 1: Why don't you want to date me? Person 2: Because you are ugly Person 1: Why am I ugly? Person 2: Because you have bad features. Person 1: Why do i have bad features? Person 2: It's your genetics. Person 1: Why is it my genetics Person 2: Cuz that's the way god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: Because god's god made you Person 1: Why Person 2: Because the god of god of god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: That's the way the god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of (GOES ON FOREVER!!!) made you.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops