I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

thumb_up thumb_down +9

There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

So, Ryan Dunn was driving under the influence of alcohol. The result of this action proved to be fatal for both Ryan and his passenger; who happened to be his close and personal friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +9

SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Once, there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the boy fall off his skateboard before running into a cross-section? Because he was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

thumb_up thumb_down +7

two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops