When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

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What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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Want to hear the World's shortest joke? Peace. [L]

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a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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Q: What is the difference between a moose and a cow? A: How they're spelled.

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Why couldn't the blonde have kids? She had Ovarian Cancer.

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Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

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Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops