Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Why was Timmy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

A frog goes to a lake. he meets a photographer , the frog ask him ( can you take a picture of me? he says: sure ...say cheese.... then the frog said :....yogurt

Manchester City

whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

What do you call a black guy robbing a store ? A theif

Ask me if I'm a toaster Are you a toaster? No, I'm a tree.

why didn't the Asian ask for a calculator cause he was doing the dishes and a calculator seemed inappropriate

What happens when you mix mints with fizzy drinks Blast off

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

Did you hear about the guy who lost his whole left side??? Yeah he's all right now!!!

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

A blind man jumped out of the way as a car ran through the red light at a one way street.

Q: What do you call a barn full of black people? A: Antique farm equipment.

Roses are gray, violets are gray. I'm color blind.

Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

A women in the kitchen.

What do you get for the man that has everything already? Another one.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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