why did the other chicken cross the road peer pressure

What did Aladin say to Mulan? Nothing. Although they are both Disney characters, they never appear in the same film, and therefore never communicate.

What happened to the lion which escaped from the zoo? It was successfully recaptured.

so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

What did the cow say to the other cow? "Baaa", he had an identity crisis.

Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

A girl asks her mother, "Mummy, why am i called Rose?" "Because when you were 1 day old a rose petal landed on your head." Another girl asked her mother, "Mummy, why am i called Daisy?" "Because when you were 1 day old a daisy landed on your head" "alualualualalughghphphpphphp" "Shut up fridge"

Who has two thumbs and is happy? This girl! You're a girl?

Two gay men are seen walking down a street in Texas. Actually now that I think about it homosexuality is pretty much outlawed in Texas. Two gay men are thrown into a Texan Jail where they spend the rest of their lives, cold hungry and alone.

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a human being and one is an inanimate object that people enjoy sitting on.

Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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