What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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Rylan Clark

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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What did the homosexual community have last night? A protest for gay rights.

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this isn't an anti joke but you guys remember teletubbies?

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FOX News: Fair and balanced

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What did Harry Potter say when he lost his wand? Where's my wand?

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haha black people :D

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Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

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how do u stop a cat from peeing on the floor? Kill it... haha

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar, has a few drinks, chats with some fans, and leaves. The very next day, Justin Bieber is out buying groceries.

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Yo mama so fat she at the rest of this joke.

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Why did the person get hit by a fridge? They didn't for its physically impossible for most people to throw a normal sized refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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