Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

Joke below was made by Daniel Textor, he's a d i c k.

Why was the woman so hot? she was on fire

What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

I met a muslim girl the other day Shes the bomb

whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

Yo mamma so stupid... She's considering going to college to get a better education

A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

Two cows are sitting in a bathtub. One cow says please pass the soap. The other cow says nothing, cause it's a cow, making it incapable if speech. The other cow was just a guy in a cow costume.

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

Jeez Bill, how drunk was I last night? You took my pet parakeet, threw it at my daughter's piggy bank and yelled "ANGRY BIRDS!!!!"

David: Hey Bill. Do you know what the most common place for a Democrat to work is? Bill: No. David: An insane Asylum, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a black person to work is? Bill: No. David: A prison, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a 20th centrury undercover German Jew to work is? Bill: No. David: A morge, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a Scientologist to work is? Bill: No. David: With Democrats. (Writen by Ben, avid Anti-Scienctologist)

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally raped and murder six's parents whilst six hid in the closet and watched.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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