Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why are all black people fast? because all the slow ones are in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

thumb_up thumb_down +1

An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like. The man says,"I'm feeling light today so I'll just have some H2O." The man's friend says,"I'm feeling the same. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

-How do you wake up Lady Gaga? -Poke her face

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the Jewish girl do when I asked for her number? Roll up her sleeve...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the boy fall off the sky scraper. It was hit by an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats the diffrences between black people and a tire nothin

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a trampoline and a cat? I take mu cleats off when I jump on a trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops