What's Funny and has two Wheels A kids falling off his bike

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What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

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An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

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What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

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Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

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Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

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Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

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A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

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Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

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A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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123 f*ck off

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops