A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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Q: Why were there four married men in one room without their pants on? A: because it was the mens bathroom.

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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Knock Knock.

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Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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