what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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12 in general

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Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

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Q: What did the police officer tell the man without a shirt on? A: Put a shirt on.

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

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Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????1?2?3?4?5?6?7?8?9?0?????????#????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????©®™?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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