Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

If Chuck Norris were to be hit by a train he would die

Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

dyslexic's Untie

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

If Irishmen didn't walk out of bars, they would collect and eventually fill the bars of the world and would die given the bars could not support them.

Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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