What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

star wars kid

Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Walt dies in breaking bad.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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