Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

Do you know what lmnop is? No. A group of five consecutive letters.

Where's my baby??

Why was the man denied access to the college Because he did not have good grades in the past.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

What do you give a black man for his Christmas? A gift that you feel would suit his personality so that he may draw enjoyment from said gift.

Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

Jesse's mom is so god damn fat that it is an extreme danger just being around her

You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

whats black? the colour

What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

ever tried african food? they neither

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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