Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

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Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

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What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

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I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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A man walks into a meat shop. Man: I bet you $20 you can't reach the meat on the top shelf. Butcher: The steaks are too high

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A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

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What do joe greene and joe biden have in common? Their first name

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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