What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

Knock knock Whos there? Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Who's there?! "is anyone home this is Helan Keller"

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

How did Pablo get into America from Mexico? He drove here!

What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

What did one duck say to the other duck? Quack.

"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

What does shit smell like? Your maaaa

jack be nimble jack be quick jack is a parapeligic.....there's no need for more

Roses are red violets are blue make me a sandwhich so i can eat it

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

What do you call a zebra eating Cheerios? A zebra eating Cheerios.

What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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