What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

Do you know what the worst part about inbreeding is? - It's runs in the family!

What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

whats the difference between a black man playing basketball and a white man playing basketball? They are different races

Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

Whats the difference between a bong and a nigger? My bong works

How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.?

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

How do you stop the London riots? - You employ a a highly effective police tactic to diffuse the crisis as quickly as possible.

KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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