Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

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Why is the sky blue? Time to get a watch.

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what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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A man and a woman meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony was rubbish but the reception was brilliant

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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Why did the boy fall over? Because he got hit by a car. Follow forever.art7 on Insta.

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

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Why did the blonde's parents take away her car? She didn't pay for half the insurance like she said she would.

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

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It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

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Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

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Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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