What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

Q.What do you call a friend with benefits? A. a buck fuddy.

A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

Why did the paraplegic die in a fire? He couldn't get down the stairs.

A man walks into a bar. He's just entered into the Twilight Zone.

Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" After hearing this common expression, the horse looks up at the bartender. With this look, the bartender realizes that he has been speaking to I'll Have Another. Aware his faux pas, the bartender apologizes and pours him a free drink. The free drink does little for I'll Have Another's crushed dreams.

What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

What do they call Chinese food in China? Food

Wanna hear a joke? Niklas Bendter being good at soccer. Wanna hear a funnier joke? Your Mom Wanna hear the funniest joke?

Q: what's green and fluffy? A: green fluff

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

What did the monkey say to the receptionist? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

What do you call a monkey lost in a desert? A donkey who was forgotten by his owner.

Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

A Black man walks into the Dentist's office, because he cares about his hygiene.

What do you say to a black man in the morning? Good morning

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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