How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops