How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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A man takes his girlfriend ice skating on a lake. As they are ice skating she says "we should go back home and fu..." At this point they fall through a thin spot on the ice and they both drown in the lake. Fish ate their dead bodies

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See you later... Just joke I'm blind

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What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

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A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

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Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

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Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

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What do joe greene and joe biden have in common? Their first name

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

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What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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Potassium? K.

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

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why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops