What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

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How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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what did the man say to the person he hates? nothing!

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Knock Knock [Opens Door]

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What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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What did Tim's grandma get him for his birthday? Nothing, because Tim's grandma died in a car accident 2 years ago

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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What's the correct way to eat spaghetti? Put it in your mouth.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Yellow People !!

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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Q)what do you call a homless a man ?? A) dunno ask him what his name it (LOL RANDOMZZZ)

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Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

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What do you get when you put a woman in a room with 4 guys? She gets Gang Banged.

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What do you get when a person and a cat try to have a child of some sort? Nothing because there chromosomes don't match, and there for physically impossible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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