If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

thumb_up thumb_down +3

whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

thumb_up thumb_down +3

"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

i'm hard

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the boy fail his maths test? He had no eyes due to a vicious bear attack earlier that year so couldn't read the questions or study from books resulting in him not being able to complete the task he was given.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

hi

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the student say to the teacher, after being assigned homework? This isn't my best subject, can I stay after class for tutoring?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There are 3 Chinese guys migrating to the USA, Chu, Bu and Fu. . Chu added a 'ck' to? his name and became Chuck Bu did the same thing and became Buck. Fu got sent back to china

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops