"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm allergic to both Now I'm dead

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

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three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

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There were 50 koreans; half of them liked gangnam style but the other half didn't. Why didn't the other half like gangnam style? They were north koreans.

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What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

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What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

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what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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Im taking a shit right now.

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

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the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops