If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

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I'm so punny.

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Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

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Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

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why did the girl fall off the swing..? because she became unbalanced and the force of gravity extended on her was too great to prevent the fall

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jack be nimble jack be quick jack is a parapeligic.....there's no need for more

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Roses are red violets are blue ice-cream is yummy can I eat you

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

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What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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