Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

Whats the worst thing your parents could ever do to a teenager? Take there phone.

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

There is no I in team... But there is a u in suck. There is no I in team, but there is in awesome

Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

A black man walks down a high street and sees a white woman approaching. He bids her good day and they carry on their respective journeys. He then turns around and follows the white woman and rapes her in a dark alleyway, because as we all know, all black men are rapists.

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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