What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice tits

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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Q: Whats the difference between porno and your mom? A: I can masturbate to porno

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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