What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

What did the orphan do on Mother's Day? He went to the cemetery

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN cil you have such a dirty mind

Why did the black man go to jail? Because he committed a criminal offense.

Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

What did the african child get for christmas? Abducted.

Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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