whats the diffrence between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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If you have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, Chuck Norris now has $10.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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roses are rose, violets are violet, now shut up, you retarded black poet!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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So I was making love to my cat the other day, and my pet dog comes in.

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An overweight person falls down the stairs.. They had to be taken to A&E as they suffered very serious injuries.

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Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

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What do you call a midget cripple with cerebral palsy? Unfortunate

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What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

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a man walks into a bar, he tells the bartender "im not a part of this SYSTEM"

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How do you offend a black person? Call him a nigger.

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What did the orphan do on Mother's Day? He went to the cemetery

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I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

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roses are red, violets are blue, get on your knees ho, and stick to me like glue.

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What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

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What do you call a camel with three humps? A deformed bactrian

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

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Why did the retarted kids head get stuck in the window? It was a very small window

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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