Why are Pirates called Pirates? Because the word originates from the term Pirata which means 'sea attacker' in Latin.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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KNOCK KNOCK WHOSE THERE? AVOCADO AVOCADO WHO AVOCADO COLD THAT'S A RETARD JOKE HAHAHAHAHA GOOD 1

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There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

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A coyote walks into a bar, because human development has rapidly destroyed his natural habitat. He mauls three patrons.

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A man walks into a bar with an MP5 and proceeds to fire thirteen bullets into a crowd of people, several unarmed bystanders attempt to disarm the gunman but they are promptly ordered to stay back or they too would be fired on, a witness reports gunfire coming from down the street to local emergency services and they arrive quickly, organising a perimeter around the bar, county sherriffs decide it would be safest to wait for a swat team, as reports indicated the gunman may have hostages, however the gunfire appears to have ceased an noone has entered or exited the building since police arrived on scene. As SWAT arrives on scene and media helicopters circle above, a person emerges from the bar and the gunman appears behind him, he shoots and kills the hostage and then turns the gun on himself, the death toll reached sixteen including the gunman and as many as fourteen people were injured. there was no clear motive to the massacre, but a search of his appartment indicated he was tired of one-liners on typical joke sites and felt his wife's betrayal with his best friend was too much to bare and he simply snapped after losing his job in the current economic situation.

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Why was the black man very rich? Because he was a lawyer who worked hard and was able to provide himself with a steady income.

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

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Why did the Mexican fall off of a cliff? He lost is ballence.

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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binladin walks into the american seals

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The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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irish man drinking john smiths

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

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roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

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on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

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A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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