My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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what did the black guy ge for christmas? a speeding ticket

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There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

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A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

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What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino? A freak.

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Did you hear the one about the streetlight? It only came on at night.

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What do you call a zebra with no stripes? A zebra with no stripes

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back at her

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What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

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Once, there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Stab them in the chest 43 times.

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There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

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What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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