why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chicken is a funny word, and the road is a plot device.

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What did the American WWII soldier say to the Feudal-era samurai? Nothing, because the two lived on completely different continents and in completely different time periods.

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What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

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A man walks up to his boss and asks "Do you want to hear a funny joke?". His boss replied,"Yes". Before the man could finish his joke, his boss had a heart attack and died instantly. The next day, when he's in his car with his wife, he asks "You want to hear a joke?", the wife replied "Sure,". before the man could finish his joke, a car hit them and the wife died but the man happened to survive. The next day, he sat on a bench mourning, his friend walked up to him and asked, "Why are you sad?". the man answered, "Every time I try and tell a joke someone dies!", his friend said, "That's not true, just tell me the joke." "Ok" "Two Pigeons walk into a-". Before he can finish his joke his friends is kidnapped and killed. Sadly, the man walks to a ledge, jumps off and commits suicide. The End

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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What do you call a something with no limbs? a snake

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

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You you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you. Way do go lazy you didn't read all the you's so you didn't realize there was a yoo in there. But now you realize there aren't any yoo's there way to go.

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A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

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Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

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i bought a knock-knock joke book, and was unamused.

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I can prove I'm a psychic - this post is going to receive a lot of dislikes.

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Why did the rooster cross the road? Because he wanted to prove he wasn't a chicken.

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y r black people noses so big??? A= god had to hold tem somehere to spray paint them

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A boy is diagnosed with terminal cancer. His family prays for him and he still dies.

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What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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