A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

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Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

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Roses are red Im adopted

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

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guess what what ...

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How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

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Your family tree is like a cactus, its full of pricks. ;P

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What's worse then 1 bee sting? -2 Bee stings. What's worse then 2 bee stings? -The Holocaust. What's worse then the Holocaust? -3 Bee stings.

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How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

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How could you tell Adam and Eve wasn't black? ANSWER--YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE A RIB FROM A BLACK MAN. ISSAIAH FROM OHIO YOLO:]

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a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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How do you scare a black man? You dont

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Once Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a guy so hard that he got a large bruise.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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