What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

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A man walks into a bar. He hasn't been there before, and it's a Friday so it's really crowded, and it's really quite a dive, so he and his girlfriend decide to leave and find somewhere else to eat.

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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Cameron is a r e t a r d

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

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Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

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What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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it was all Tagart

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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What do you get from M&M bags? M&Ms.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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A Jew, Muslim and Mexican all die of cancer

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what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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