Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

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Q: Why was little Timmy afraid of clowns? A: The one at his birthday party killed his parents.

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Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

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Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

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What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

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You know why one side of the "v" formation of a flock of geese is longer don't you? Cause it has more geese in it.

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Q: What's worse? Inhaling fly spray or deodorant? A: The Holocaust

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She Explored My Body, Licked, Sucked, Swallowed! When Satisfied, She Left! . . . . Damn Mosquito!!!

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How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

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What do a grape and an Elephant have in common? For sensitivity to people who suffer from color blindness, this joke has been cancelled.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

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What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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Why didn't 6 like 7? Because 7 was a huge racist.

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What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

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What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

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a man dropped a bar of soap in the shower. He immediately picked it up and finished washing himself. He then got dressed and left the gym.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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I was going to tell a gay joke. But that would offensive

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it

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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