What's brown and sticky? A black man's dick after raping you.

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

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Grace Ackerson

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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Dear Rubix Cube, DONE!! Sincerely, Colorblind

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how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

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roses are red grass is greener get in the bed and suck on my wiener

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

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What's worse then falling up the stairs? Ketchup

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? Humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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A bear walks into a bar. Everyone evacuates as animal control safely asses the situation.

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A man walks up to a girl and says "Hello there" The girl doesn't respond because she has been deaf and blind for her entire life and doesn't know he is there. Potatoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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