What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

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Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Fortunately, the bra was on display in a clothing store and was not actually being worn at the time.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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I told my two lesbian friends I wanted to join them. I am a priest in a Gay Marriage friendly state and they are happily married.

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Q why was John bullied A Becuase he told kids that bullying was a bad and serious problem to get them to stop bullying jimmy unfortunately Jimmy killed himself because he was bullied to much and didn't want to live.

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Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

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Boy: Knock Knock! Girl: Who's there? Boy: It's me, John. Girl: Oh, come in!

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A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

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http://api.solvemedia.com/papi/media?c=2@4kVxPaRsBr6xmKYFf1AWrnUekZ5Qm16e@VS0Tc9Os5q8ENU8bgrSzdX9APTC4lJjowvMEvv53MnevBtoOvXkqvmo6q3GRjryi4pBIcsYECoiZmERhCMm3t7otsPlwyu31uNcluNyw3UKXeBeML2ZQF3X3Wfs3WC6Cdp-lOv-Y0fRdSiML4k2yPqmVJrbT.a9hCr0BoWsRJvq7n7aejLjOmz3h3eZDdwJaN54pFV-QOvO5sQ5wVZlVq-2yi9hMbBbb213AoVTT7vLIhTq0xcBFvtuMdWdS2jn2ActORr3W16MmSEVcgrS6gA;w=300;h=150;fg=ffffff;bg=5d216b

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle of it. The drunk shouts "lesh shmash it down!" then passes out. The tweeker says "Dude, we should totally take the lock apart and see if there's some kind of mechanism in there holding it together that we can use to build some sort of machine for taking... oh man I gotta crap so bad! Either of you guys gota smoke?" and the pot head says "We should sit here and wait." I didn't say it was a good story

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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what cuts the grass on christmas eve and lives in mexico? JP I lied about Mexico jackin it in san diego

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What did the police officer say to the bank robber? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney, and to have an attorney present during any questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided for you at government expense.

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News:Little boy found dead in old man's white van. Turns out the old man goes to the store and when he comes back the little boy chokes on an apple.

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What did the women get after valentines day? An abortion.

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why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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