What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

What do you call a black man driving a fire truck? A firefighter you racist.

Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, I do not stand for them.

What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

what is the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

Why was the blonde fired from her job at the M&M's factory? Her Masters Degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the position she had.

What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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