How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His mother was a prostitute.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

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What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

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what you say to the kid that just hit puberty? your a young man

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Why is the Holocaust/Worm in your apple joke the highest rated joke on Anti Jokes? Most of the viewers of this website clicked on a thumbs up symbol directly below the joke, which by the coding of this website triggered an algorithm that caused the number adjacent to this thumbs up button to increase and also caused the joke to appear higher on the list of most popular jokes.

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Joe is a negotiator. When joe sees someone in trouble, he tries to help them out of it by talking. Joe failed to talk to Osama bin laden correctly. Joe is no longer living in this world. Joe drank his sorrows away and died from the alcohol in his body. Osama is completely unrelated to this, his family died in a car crash.

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

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Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. That's what she said

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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A kid walks into a bar and the bartender yells, "Get Out!"

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

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Roses are red , violets are blue, you like 1d? STFU

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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