There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

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First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

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The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

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once, my friend said hi. i said hi back

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What do you call a bad joke website? anti joke

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Whats two plus two Four!

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What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

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okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

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An Irishman walked out of a bar

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Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

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What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

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Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

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A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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