A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

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your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

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You want to hear a joke? Republican

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How do you scare a black man? You dont

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What is Worst than having a cancer ? Having two cancer

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

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Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

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U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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"Imagine a World Without Free Knowledge" -I'm not imagining, thanks Wikipedia!

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Jesus saves, passes to Moses who shoots and scores!!!

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What do you call justin bieber haveing sex with a lady? A dream

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HEY!

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Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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what goes in hard and comes out soft? bubblegum, what were you thinking?

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Uh... Justin, the most pointless man... I gotta cringe for a moment, I don't want to be mean here, but I think my body cell total opinion pool dropped a large quantity there, its not that I do not want you anymore, but, my body`s mass body cell total is kinda denying me... Actually I am denying IT... ACTUALLY WE ARE DENYING EACH OTHER, (which is totally awesome, united denial fighting against one another FOR DENYING THE MOST! BECAUSE COOPERATION IS FOR PUSSIES!) Anyway, hell I am dead tired, oh yeah, Justin... Man, Uh, who where you again?

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A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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