Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

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What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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How did Nissan show its new car in there commircals By driving very fast and hitting fat kids $

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Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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What would happen if the whole world farted at once?

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Why did the boy go back in time? He didn't. He was mutilated by rabid apes.

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What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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Once upon a time a was born

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Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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