A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

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What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

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How do you make a plummer sad? Kill his family.

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Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

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Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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Knock Knock. There was no answer.

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What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

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Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Only musicians will understand.

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Cameron is a r e t a r d

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What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

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How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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What did the man say when he saw his t.v. floating in the middle of the night? I must be seeing things. By logic, televisions don't float. My weary eyes must be playing tricks on me and I should probably go back to sleep.

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what's the difference between you and a yack one is a spitting idiot and the other one is a camel

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Doesn't matter. He was hit by a semi truck.

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Chris is hairy

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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whate white and cant climb trees? powdered sugar

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops