The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

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What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

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You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

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What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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The american education system.

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Question:Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Answer:Because she had no arms or legs. Question:What did little Susie get for Christmas? Answer: a bike, and cancer Question: what did little Susie get next Christmas? Answer: nothing, she didn't live that long... Knock knock Who's there Not little Susie

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roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

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Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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time to spruce up!

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James walks into a room he then leaves as the room is full of hot women but he does not find them attractive as he has a girlfriend and is also bisexual.

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whats worse than a friend asking you if their ugly, telling them to look in the mirror.

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Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

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A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

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An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

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how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

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How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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a dyslexic man walked his god.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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