Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

A man bought a white van, He later brutally molested a small boy.

Why did the black man walk into the catholic church? He was catholic.

You trying to be funny kid? This is a matter of security to the national degree, point zero has been compromised, unless you bring out one of these soon, I am myself going to drag your ass into prison.

when there's trouble lurking in your neighbourhood, who you gonna call? The local authorities.

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

Son: "Mommy That Boy Over There Beat Me Up" Mom: Good I Like When You Suffer

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

What did the Frog say to the other Frog? Nothing they can't speak

How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not intelligent enough to realize the hazardous dangers of crossing the street.

What did the jew say to the black man? Nothing they were in a mall that got invaded by evil trees.

someone tell england that a depressed guy smoking a cigarette is not a movie.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Beacuse he got kicked out of the bar

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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