A man walks into a bar the bartender looks at the man and says "Hey son you wanna make one hundred bucks?" the man looks at the bartender and says "Im not your son."

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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What did the black man get for christmas? A present.

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What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

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Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

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What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

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What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

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What do you call a black man in church? Religious

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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Why didn't Jane go to school last Thursday? It was summer. No one went to school last Thursday.

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What hurts like hell? HELL

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Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

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Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

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knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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