Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

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Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

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HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

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Q: What's blue and smells like grass? A: Blue grass.

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Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

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Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

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cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

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Was the worlds most expensive comedian any fun? Well, he was funny, but they where all cheap laughs. Moral: Expensive jokes are expensive.

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

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What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

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How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

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Your mom is so old she died

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

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yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

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what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

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A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

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What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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