Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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Q. What do mummies do when they run out of toilet paper? A. Nothing - they're dead and inanimate.

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What do you call a girl with no arms and legs? Whatever her name is.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

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Son: "Mommy That Boy Over There Beat Me Up" Mom: Good I Like When You Suffer

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

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when there's trouble lurking in your neighbourhood, who you gonna call? The local authorities.

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What did the Frog say to the other Frog? Nothing they can't speak

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 had paranoia.

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

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asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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Justin Bieber

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What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

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Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

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What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

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What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

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There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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