Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

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Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The black man is alive.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

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how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

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scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

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Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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