Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

Why did the guy die. He OD on drugs

what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

Why was Helen Keller depressed? She was deaf and blind.

HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

A man and a cucumber walk into a bar. They sit three seats away from each other and intermediately give nervous looks to one another. Finally the man stands up and declares "I hate bar jokes" and walks out.

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

Why did the man give money to a drug dealer? He lost a bet.

Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

What did the young man's clothes smell like after a long night of partying? Laundry detergent, it was quite pleasant

Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

The umpire asked the baseball coach "Who is that on 1st base?" The baseball coach said "Who." The umpire said "Yes, that's what I'm asking." The baseball coach handed the umpire a list of his players to avoid any further confusion.

whats black white and red all over an abused child

how do you find will smith in the snow? look for his teeth

What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

knock knock who's there? A worm, your dead in a coffin.

What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

kkkk

why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...