A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

Laughter is the best medicine. Not for cancer.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

Knock Knock? Whos there? Not Madeleine McCann.

Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

I am going to school I live in Ohio, but I'm at Germany How do I do it? I'm a blonde, nobody knows

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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