what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

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I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

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What do you call it when a black man kills an Asian man? Murder.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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Yo Momma is Like a Prostitute... ...I pay her for sexual intecourse

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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roses are red poo is poo

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A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

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Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

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What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

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p

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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