What's orange and rhymes with a parrot. A carrot

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? You shouldn't call him anything. He needs help. -Tag

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was among thousands of men who were also from Nantucket.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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a man walks into a casino, it's the third time this week and he's contemplating suicide.

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curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

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Two baby seals walk into a club.

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Pfft. Stupid. Apples are for healthy people. Go for the ice cream. There's no worms in that.

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Okay lord and master, now get lost, I am trough with you, I have other things to get done, XD My nose is so itchy XD

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

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A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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A man was walking home when a little boy ran up to him. He said "hey mister, how do you sleep apples?" Then the man wasn't sure why he asked him so he spelled it out for him "that's easy my boy, A-P-P-L-E" the little boy said "you said pee pee!" Then he laughed and ran off

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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