What's worst than the holocaust? Coming home and having your parents say " we received an email from your teacher today"

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A wild bear walks into a bar, grabs a drink and looks at the man next to it. The man then wakes up from a dream and gets ready for work.

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Why did the man cross the street? He just wanted to .. i don't see why not, i mean he could have gotten ran over by a train on a road but who knows he could have been run over by a turtle!

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Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

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A 16 year old boy and girl have unprotected sex. The girl becomes pregnant and decides to keep the baby. They both drop out of high school, get lots of government cheese, and the boy holds a steady job as manager at the local mcdonalds for the rest of his life.

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class is canceled. My professor died.

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What do you call a Muslim man flying a plane? The pilot.

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What happened to the turtle that was on land Dead

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How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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lol

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Yeah, I know too, its as if "Omg he has not replied in 5 seconds something must be wrong", sorry about that. Not endorphin person? That cannot be too good.

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

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Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

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What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

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What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

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What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

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You are joking right?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was tired of hearing that joke

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it was a black guy a white guy a chinese guy a french guy an arab guy an irish guy and a juncky that was too much for a joke

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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Q. what do you call mexican stoners A. baked beans

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Pokerface.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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